Showing posts with label Balance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Balance. Show all posts
1 April - an april fall
Returning to bed after trip to the bathroom I lost my ballance and fell on the floor. Once there I had not enough strength to get up again. Olga called the emmergency service. After an hour and a half the first responce had arrived and soon got me on my feet again. I can't help wandering if this is a the beginning of the end and I will progressively find it more and more difficult to do one things after another. Using the computer is impossible even with voice recognition software (Olga is typing it for me). We wandered if weakness in my legs and arms is a side effect of steroid medication. Our GP doesn't think so. She thinks the simptoms I'm getting may mean my tumour is growing back again. We won't know untill I have a new MRI scan. So we are anxiously awaiting an appointment.
28 October - A hole in my vision
I have been avoiding use of the computer ever since I returned from my operation. I have become aware of a large blind spot in my left hand side lower peripheral vision.
If I sit with my arms straight down by my sides and then raise my forearms so that they are at right angles in front of me and flap my hands, I cannot see my left hand moving. I am not sure at the moment if it is only my left eye or my vision in general that are affected. Experiments blocking out one eye have so far been inconclusive.
Using the computer has become very frustrating. A non-touch typist, I rely on being able to look at the keyboard and I am often hitting the key to one side of the one I want. It also makes checking for typos difficult. I have trouble finding the cursor. My brain seems to try to compensate for the problem by superimposing one column of text over another. Reading is awkward for much the same reason.
I am pretty sure that this is at the root of what I have been describing as a balance problem. The problem is the blind spot on my left hand side. I tend to bump into things on my left. I don't see properly where I am putting my left foot. This makes me react as if I am going to step into a void. I am really only comfortable walking if I have something to hold on to. A walking stick helps but I prefer holding on to Olga's arm when moving, to provide a physical point of reference.
I first became aware of the problem a day or two after my operation. I mentioned it to a couple of doctors who came to see me. One commented that perhaps they had nicked the optic nerve. Since then I have had one period of clear vision. I did have similar problems after my first brain tumour removal operation and they did get better after several weeks so perhaps this will clear up by itself.
The doctors have all told me that I have done very well surviving a GBM4 tumour by more than two years. I get the feeling that I should be thankful for what I have got instead of carping about what I haven't. As I am never likely to get my driving licence back with this type of tumour this disability does not have much impediment on what I can do at the moment.
If I sit with my arms straight down by my sides and then raise my forearms so that they are at right angles in front of me and flap my hands, I cannot see my left hand moving. I am not sure at the moment if it is only my left eye or my vision in general that are affected. Experiments blocking out one eye have so far been inconclusive.
Using the computer has become very frustrating. A non-touch typist, I rely on being able to look at the keyboard and I am often hitting the key to one side of the one I want. It also makes checking for typos difficult. I have trouble finding the cursor. My brain seems to try to compensate for the problem by superimposing one column of text over another. Reading is awkward for much the same reason.
I am pretty sure that this is at the root of what I have been describing as a balance problem. The problem is the blind spot on my left hand side. I tend to bump into things on my left. I don't see properly where I am putting my left foot. This makes me react as if I am going to step into a void. I am really only comfortable walking if I have something to hold on to. A walking stick helps but I prefer holding on to Olga's arm when moving, to provide a physical point of reference.
I first became aware of the problem a day or two after my operation. I mentioned it to a couple of doctors who came to see me. One commented that perhaps they had nicked the optic nerve. Since then I have had one period of clear vision. I did have similar problems after my first brain tumour removal operation and they did get better after several weeks so perhaps this will clear up by itself.
The doctors have all told me that I have done very well surviving a GBM4 tumour by more than two years. I get the feeling that I should be thankful for what I have got instead of carping about what I haven't. As I am never likely to get my driving licence back with this type of tumour this disability does not have much impediment on what I can do at the moment.
4 September - Return from London
Just returned from a very nice break in London. Considering that at one point I felt so poorly that I doubted whether I would be able to go, The trip went without problems. The dexomethasone steroids made me feel a lot better. My balance improved but only by a little. We took advantage of disabled facilities to borrow a wheelchair in most of the places we visited. I was a bit reluctant to do this at first as I was aware that none of the people I know of who began using a wheelchair are still here today, but it did make things easier.
Whilst we were away we received an appointment at the hospital for a scan tomorrow afternoon (Thursday.). This is for a CT scan not the MRI scan we were expecting.Ours is no to reason why. As long as it shows what it needs to.
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| At the Victoria and Albert Museum |
23 August - A question of balance
This problem I have with my balance seems to be getting worse and worse. Olga and I have arranged a trip away in London and it has got to the stage where I'm doubting my ability to go.I am aso expeiencing difficulty typing on the computer. Inless I cencentrate really hard, everything omes out as alphabet soup. This post willbe brief as a result.
I have become convinced that my tumour is regrowing.We phoned the hospital to see if we caqn get my next MRI scan expedited but were told that the only person who can make that happen is my GP, so off to the surgery we go.
The GP says that the symptoms I am experiencing could well be caused by my tumour. She prescribes some of my old friends - dexamethasone steroids - and some other tablets to increase blood supply to the brain. She promises to contact the hospital and try to get me an MRI scan as soon as possible. But it's a bank holiday weekend so it's anyone's guess how soon that will be. Meantime we return home and I have a sleepless night mulling over the implications of this new development.
I have become convinced that my tumour is regrowing.We phoned the hospital to see if we caqn get my next MRI scan expedited but were told that the only person who can make that happen is my GP, so off to the surgery we go.
The GP says that the symptoms I am experiencing could well be caused by my tumour. She prescribes some of my old friends - dexamethasone steroids - and some other tablets to increase blood supply to the brain. She promises to contact the hospital and try to get me an MRI scan as soon as possible. But it's a bank holiday weekend so it's anyone's guess how soon that will be. Meantime we return home and I have a sleepless night mulling over the implications of this new development.
19 August - Taking a tumble
Life goes on with nothing particularly noteworthy to write about. The unsteadiness on my feet that I have often complained about continues to be a concern. I don't go anywhere without a walking stick or without Olga. I often take her hand to steady myself. We must look like a couple of newly-weds walking along the street hand in hand!
Yesterday I went down to the bottom of the garden to reset the weather station which had stopped working. When I got there I realised I would need a blunt object to poke the reset button. I turned around to go back for it and found myself falling to my right. I put my foot out to save myself but I tripped over the border to the raised bed. No injury was caused other than to a few plants which cushioned my fall, and my pride of course.
We are booked to spend a few days in London the weekend after next so I hope I can keep my feet then.Olga wants to see the state rooms at Buckingham Palace and has arranged a wheelchair for me for the visit. Having to use a wheelchair feels to me like the thin end of the wedge and I tried to resist the idea but I find it tiring standing around and the sweat runs down my back with the effort of keeping upright so it is probably the most practical solution. No doubt the Royal Albert Hall will also present some challenges!
I am a little concerned that this balance problem might be a sign that my tumour is growing again. Olga found several possible links between radiotherapy and balance issues and vertigo. Really I should be getting this information from my doctors. I would like another MRI scan soon to put my mind at rest about what is happening to my brain. But my next doctor's appointment is not until October so I'm unlikely to receive another scan much before then.
Yesterday I went down to the bottom of the garden to reset the weather station which had stopped working. When I got there I realised I would need a blunt object to poke the reset button. I turned around to go back for it and found myself falling to my right. I put my foot out to save myself but I tripped over the border to the raised bed. No injury was caused other than to a few plants which cushioned my fall, and my pride of course.
We are booked to spend a few days in London the weekend after next so I hope I can keep my feet then.Olga wants to see the state rooms at Buckingham Palace and has arranged a wheelchair for me for the visit. Having to use a wheelchair feels to me like the thin end of the wedge and I tried to resist the idea but I find it tiring standing around and the sweat runs down my back with the effort of keeping upright so it is probably the most practical solution. No doubt the Royal Albert Hall will also present some challenges!
I am a little concerned that this balance problem might be a sign that my tumour is growing again. Olga found several possible links between radiotherapy and balance issues and vertigo. Really I should be getting this information from my doctors. I would like another MRI scan soon to put my mind at rest about what is happening to my brain. But my next doctor's appointment is not until October so I'm unlikely to receive another scan much before then.
26 May - A summit reached
On Sunday I completed a five mile walk that included one of Lakeland's lesser summits. I think I probably overdid it a bit. We did complete the last section up hill from Cockermouth town centre to home in a taxi. But despite that I am pleased with what I accomplished,
Before setting off I was anything but sure I would get all the way to the summit which is 254m high. I was surprised how well my legs felt. I certainly walked a lot slower than I used to do but I didn't find the ascent at all taxing. It was only on the final couple of hundred metres that I began to tire. The sight of the summit spurred me on until we reached it.
I should have been overjoyed at having accomplished this, my first fell walk since discovering that I had a brain tumour. But my happiness was marred by the discovery that one problem that has occurred since my treatment does not appear to be going away. My sense of balance is hopeless.
I am like a toddler who has just learned to walk but hasn't completely mastered it. Except I am rather a large toddler. Although I manage to avoid falling over with the help of my walking stick I panic when I have to negotiate uneven ground, and usually need Olga's hand for additional support. Two walking sticks might help, though I have always preferred to keep one hand free and regard an additional stick as an encumbrance.
I think I have heard others who have had brain surgery and radiotherapy mention balance problems. It may be an effect of the radiotherapy as I don't recall having a balance problem in my first weeks of recovery. I have mentioned it to my oncologist and he asks me about it but doesn't pass any further comment. I am afraid that some part of my brain has been irreparably damaged and that no matter how well my fitness may improve I will never be rid of this problem.
Before setting off I was anything but sure I would get all the way to the summit which is 254m high. I was surprised how well my legs felt. I certainly walked a lot slower than I used to do but I didn't find the ascent at all taxing. It was only on the final couple of hundred metres that I began to tire. The sight of the summit spurred me on until we reached it.
I should have been overjoyed at having accomplished this, my first fell walk since discovering that I had a brain tumour. But my happiness was marred by the discovery that one problem that has occurred since my treatment does not appear to be going away. My sense of balance is hopeless.
I am like a toddler who has just learned to walk but hasn't completely mastered it. Except I am rather a large toddler. Although I manage to avoid falling over with the help of my walking stick I panic when I have to negotiate uneven ground, and usually need Olga's hand for additional support. Two walking sticks might help, though I have always preferred to keep one hand free and regard an additional stick as an encumbrance.
I think I have heard others who have had brain surgery and radiotherapy mention balance problems. It may be an effect of the radiotherapy as I don't recall having a balance problem in my first weeks of recovery. I have mentioned it to my oncologist and he asks me about it but doesn't pass any further comment. I am afraid that some part of my brain has been irreparably damaged and that no matter how well my fitness may improve I will never be rid of this problem.
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